Penat...

Yes we come to a decision....Pnat dh kpala nk fikir....buat i xboleh tido mlm2 sblm ni....

Decision yg plg susah i nk buat.... But asyik i jer yg mkn hati mana thn....Slama ni smua i telan...

But now no more. Bila ada kata2 durjana yg dilempar pada i xcukup, dilempar pada family member i....watdehel....

Seems like i jer sorg yg tahu pasal menda ni....apa yg papa & mama telan....sbb yg lain2 smua bz dgn hal masing2.

Bila air mata seorg ibu berlinangan....ko tahu?

Xpe....Hanya Allah S.W.T yg lebih mengetahui..... Itu jer yg dpt i doakan.

Papa, Mama...we'll face it together hokey....

Love u both till the end.....



p/s: Tetiba i tringat datin pnh ckp...." Bini 10 boleh cri, Mak ni ada sorg jer...."

The 4th day

Arini adalah hari ke 4 N htr ameer ke nursery. Still lg ameer bergelut nk sesuaikan diri dgn environment baru. I have to go there every lunch time utk bf dan bg mkn, that is the best alternative stkt ni.

Bila tgk ameer nangis air mata N pun tumpah. N tahu dia nangis. But xlah teruk kluar air mata bergenang2. in his mind maybe dia fikir why did my papa & mama send me here? Why? Bila tgk je bangunan skola dia trus grab my body. Merengek and finally bila teacher amik dia akan nangis.

Puas dipujuk. apalah yg ameer tahu. he just me to be around him. nk kje pn N rasa xsenang. N pun terpaksa buat smua ni. I'm sorry ameer. Mama have to do this. there nothing better then this yg mama boleh buat. i only want the best for u and for us.

N only pray that trow will be better. for Ameer. for me. Sorry sayang.

p/s: i'm crying right now....i just can't continue...

Sayunya...

I was about to check 4 unit minivan bought by hospital when suddenly N saw crowd gather in front of mortuary. Saw a malay lady crying but i don't dare to ask the relatives.

Then i decide to enter inside the mortuary and asked mr encot ( his nickname actualy )

N : "Cot apa cer?"

Encot : "dorg ni tgu body ah....( Body refer to the jenazah )

N: " wad mana cot?"

Encot : "2C ah..." ( its peads ward )

N : " isk...budak ker?"

Encot : " budak 12 tahun , sakit jantung . Dh lama sakit sjak dari kcik..."

N : "Body nk htr mane?"

Encot : "kulim"

N: " jauhnyerrr...."

N : " k ar cot. Aku blah dulu. "

Encot : " ok baby! "

As walk pass the mother, body baru kluar dari tpt dikafankan. Maknya xdpt nk thn kesdihan.... N still tringat her face....mcm2 perasaan....mmg sdih xterkata. Adik2 si mati kcik2 belaka. Smua masih xmengerti.... Sempat juga sdekah Al Fatihah sblm N berlalu dari situ.

p/s : k yaz, I am so sorry sbb N xangkat call k yaz. Rasa sebak nk menangis smlm....to YAYA, congrats sesangat sbb achieved straight A's! You go girl!

I CRY when i see this!

I never thought that this video will make me cry tetiba. Abih N digelakkan sbb nangis. But they never know why i've cry for! Mmg depa tadak perasaan! Mommies, all my follower, friends....pls spend some time and watch this video....

Ku yang hati batu nie pun nangis.....

visit http://kampung-chloe.blogspot.com/2009/10/you-must-cry-when-you-see-this.html

and please dun forget to hear the song ya....

N nk sambung nangis balik nih! sob! sob! sob! meleleh leleh ingus ku....